Tuesday, March 9, 2010

To Be or Not To Be

How many of us create lists for those wretched to-do's that we simply dread doing? Laundry, grocery shop, mop, sweep, clean the windows, scrub the toilet, pick up dry cleaning, pay bills, etc. It's horrible! How many of us make lists for what we'd like to do? How many of us put play dates (for ourselves, not the kids), self care, bubble baths, meditation, reading, writing, creating, etc. on our lists? How many of us make To-Be lists? Be aware, be patient, be kind, be loving, be relaxed, be alive, be happy, be joyful, be playful....

A few years ago I began to think about killing the to-do-list and focus on creating a to-BE-list. While I did create a shadow box listing all the wonderful things I could BE, I never quite got around to killing the to-do-list and actually focus on Being. I'm too anal for that. I'm too much of a perfectionist. How can I Be when the toilet is dirty, or when my daughter announces that she's out of pants? Didn't I just do the laundry?

Yeah, it was crossed off your list...er, six days ago?

I follow @YourToBeList on Twitter and have become a fan of their Facebook page. Recently James McMahon & Lauren Rosenfeld published their book Your To Be List--Turn Those Dreaded To-Do's into Meaningful Moments Everyday. Since I began thinking about Being more and doing less I was excited to see that someone had written a book with that exact title and I quickly ordered it from Amazon! Have I read it? Well...not yet. I've been too busy doing.

Which brings me back to my to-do-list. Why don't I have items on the list that I want to do; that empower me, make me feel good, bring me joy or nourish my mind, heart and body on the list? Why? Why does cleaning the toilet, vacuuming the rug or emptying the litter box take priority?

Okay, so I feel pretty good when the bathroom is clean.

Why do I choose to have a mediocre day rather than a blissful, magical day? Because I think we're a do-do-do-get-get-get society. Women are supposed to do it all, be it all, have it all. However, is what we're doing, being and having what we really want or what society tells us we want? Some women discover that the path they've chosen to doing, being and having it all is not the path they were destined to take. They give up corporate life and begin living their passion. Did they give up the wretched to-do list? I doubt it. However, I do think that they incorporated more to-BE items on their lists; more to-enJOY items on their lists. Shouldn't we all?

And that is exactly what I have been doing recently--one moment at a time. I'm scheduling my Self. I'm moving my body. I've lifted myself up onto the treadmill four times in the last week which is more than I've done in the past six months. I'm filling my heart with the words of other women who inspire me. This morning some words of my own came to me and before they could escape me I quickly posted them to my Facebook page.

"She awakens to the light of the rising sun. Exposing the shadows of unspoken thoughts. "Gremlins be gone!" she commands with a smile. As she raises her arms and stretches her mind." ...."She embraces the joy a new day can bring. Choices galore; such beautiful things! She inhales the air of a crisp winter morn. Spring's on its way; blossoms rise from the storm."

I've put my various blogs onto my list because I enjoy writing and sharing myself. I'm purging my cluttered spaces and making room for my creativity; for joy, for calm, for quiet, for love, for inspiration, for joy, for play, for gratitude.... I'm making room for my Being to take form; to give myself permission to make mistaeks, to fall down and to get back up. I'm making room to define the dream that I seem to resist in fear and self-doubt....but,

That's another show Oprah!

For today, I'm making room on the list for Me.

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